Nurturing my Relationship(s) with all of Life

Yesterday a small group of women spent time in a friend’s garden
We were on a mini-solo
staying with whatever caught our attention in the garden
Being open to nature
is it came to meet and greet us
after the first summer rains

I was astounded at how rich it is
How much is there
Right there where I have stepped
every week for so many weeks
But this was seemingly my first time to Truly see it,
When I finally consciously chose to go and meet the world

I saw the Crested Barbit, the very small lizard, the Chongololos making their way quietly, returned with the rain,
looking as if they had never left;
the log that has been placed for us to sit on,
the myriad colours of green, that were surely there the day before,
but which shone so much brighter after the rain.
The Bourgainvillia and the many many flowers, red, white, orange, yellow, purple
whose names I don’t know;
the beautiful rocks, placed lovingly in a basin of water,
the bird bath glistening in the sun,
the cacti,
the crooked twists of the trunks and branches of the many different trees

It felt like a haven, a miraculous paradise on this earth.

I have often appreciated Bev’s garden
But yesterday I met it in a way I have not before

And I wondered, and I wonder
how much of the gifts and miracles of life
pass me by
as I move through my life
with my awareness turned inward
moving through the stories and the dramas of my own delightful mind 🙂

I am learning something about the quality of Relationships
And that I am in relationship with all of life – not only human beings:
The earth beneath my feet,
The Trees that grow in my garden
The many birds that nest above me, the wind, the rain, the butterflies, the bats, the rocks,

And it is my choice how conscious I wish to be about those relationships

As with all relationships as I engage with them,
I discover new gifts, immense beauty.

I am discovering a world of magic,
Just waiting for me to reach out and touch it

What does it mean to be human?
In a world full of magic
To truly be human in a world full of magic…

I suspect the answer is something so much vaster
than what I have been living until now

Like the unfurling of a new shoot
I open myself and reach out
into a fresh new world

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Dissolution – A message from the Lions

I am posting a message from a dear friend, Undine, in response to my recent blog on dissolution. She speaks of her own experience that resonates so deeply, that I asked if I could share it here. Undine is a Kundalini Yoga instructor, and a fierce and wondrous woman. She is also a dancer. She began to dance in December, during our Women are Medicine Retreat. As has happened for me, it has become a part of her daily practice. She lives in Cape Town, South Africa.

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Dear Maaianne and dear all,

I can so relate – I am experiencing that as well
Dis-solution

Yogi Bhajan always said:
Do not solve your problems,
Dissolve them

I have experienced a profound healing in and since Cambodia (and before) which feels exactly like dissolution of fear.

A quietude inside, resting in myself, in the moment.

In knowing that what is is
and what I can do is setting my intent, clear and precise,
dancing, meditating, yogy-ing
and for the rest – love live and live live – alive.

In the pristine wildernis of Bergplaas Reserve among the animals, this was exacerbated, taking the dance into a total merging with nature –
One day in quiet dark expectancy of sharing ourselves with each other,
Another day in wild joy down by the river,
Finally on the last morning
in a magnificent thunderstorm, in the electrics of the lightening and the rumble of the bhvuma…

We had many many animal encounters that were so special –
All the antilopes on our doorstep,
Eland Wildebeest Kudu Springbok, Blesbok, Duiker.
Then the black eagles.
The little ones like Dassie and Rock Rabbit.
The Rocks themselves.
The Kingdom of the Trees.

And – on the peak we were allowed to spend a morning with six white lions.

Being about 2 metres away from a regal lioness awaiting our arrival, we sat in awe. She looked at each of us with her amber coloured eyes, slowly turning her head – you, and you, and you, and you. She felt our souls, she checked if we were the ones she had been waiting for, patiently, at the fence.

Her mate joining her with his amazing white mane, lying down, they simply communicated, calmly, the following:

First heal yourself (dissolve fear)
It is time, do it now.
Don’t succumb to urgency,
Yes things are urgent, but without you taking the time to heal yourself, the world will end in any case.
Yes humanity’s future is at stake But all is now, There is only now
So heal yourself
Focus, Do it now, No matter what

I embrace you all,

Undine

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Undine in front of the rocks at Kufunda, and at a gateway of vines

Something is Changing in me, Is Changed

There is a different confidence in my showing up in the world
A quiet cheerful sense of confidence

It could be attributed to years of experience,
“Now I know what I Know, what I Do”
But No
That is not it

More important,
Much more important
is a different quality of Presence in this moment

There is a fear that has dissipated, disappeared…
A fear of being unable to respond well to what life or the situation might throw me,
A fear that I don’t really know everything I am meant to know

D-i-s-s-o-l-v-i-n-g

A fear that has kept me mostly slightly dis-con-nec-ted
from each moment

Is Dissipating, as I am learning to Trust this Moment
As I am learning to Trust my Self
Learning to Trust my ability to move, to flow, to dance
with Life and what she brings
In this moment…
and the next…
and the next…

And so I can show up more fully to Whatever the Moment brings

I don’t have to try to always be one step ahead, 
and therefore never really Here

Its inverse is – “I can be right Here.
I don’t need to try to be anywhere else.”

And what a relief that is

********************* aaaahhhh

Whence does it come from, this Trust?
This quiet cheerful confidence 🙂

For me, the Dance has been the key

The Dancer knows

After hundreds of hours of dancing
Of experiencing moments – infinitesimal perhaps – but real nonetheless
where I touch deep alignment:
Body, heart, mind, soul
Together
Surrendering
Into Life

Into a place of being fully Awake – Alive
With All That Is
Where I am both Nothing and Everything

Touching Knowing
Deep knowing –
That I can Trust
Me and this Moment –
Me in this Moment

I can trust the instrument of life that I am becoming;
that I already am,
Perhaps because I am experiencing
that I am Life itself

Life dancing herself

******************

In the dance
I touch
A place from which anything can rise….

What a delight!

Dancing from this place
Dancing…

Self as Source
Self as Light
Self as Darkness

Dissolution
Cheerful knowing

I can dance

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